So Where to Next?
And so where to next?
There is a challenge here, one without name.
It is new and it requires patience.
Do I possess what I need to conquer it?
Do not build yourself another town to run from.
Do not sweep this new hope up into a fury of old beliefs and behaviors and broken hearts and hands that won’t hold yours.
And to what end?
Is there a plan?
Is there meaning?
Or is this all cyclical coincidence fruitless loveless endless nothing—
I am nothing and you are nothing and this could end the same as all the others. Yet here we are in this moment and all that exists are the infinite possibilities of the future.
And what of that future?
What reality will you choose to create for yourself?
Perhaps I do not know yet all the ways in which my heart can hurt.
Perhaps there are new chambers to discover.
Perhaps it is wrong to even ask these questions as fear can burrow holes, create chambers where there were none.
So can you manifest the reality in which you want to live?
Could it spark?
There is an unspeakable joy in loving and failing and loving and failing and loving again, despite the fear.
There is an unfathomable peace in loving yourself holy.
I wrote this poem in 2018 while working on my feature film screenplay heartbreaker, the follow-up to Multiverse Dating for Beginners. Last week, in lieu of sending a newsletter, I finished a new draft of that screenplay—the one I’ve been working on for five years.
You’ll have another newsletter in your inbox soon… Thank you for your patience. The next one is about the Pluriverse. I am so excited to share that with you. Thank you for reading and thank you for your support and care as I change and grow. Love always, Kelly ♥️
"Do not build yourself another town to run from.
Do not sweep this new hope up into a fury of old beliefs and behaviors and broken hearts and hands that won’t hold yours."
Feel this!